The Holiday Edition

Happy Holidays from the Laniels!

We hope you and yours have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

During the month of  November, I do a little kindness campaign with my students. I challenge them to do one kind thing a day like make someone laugh, help someone work out a problem, help a stranger, or simply smile. One of the challenges is to listen to each other. Like, really, really listen. I tell them that every generation has needed to learn this skill but in our day and age where we are so easily distracted by our social media accounts or the alerts ringing on our phones, we have to work extra hard to really listen to others. 

After my spiel, one of my students, {who is an incredible human being!} shared with me something he learned that might connect with this idea of listening to each other. He told me that in South Africa in one of the languages called Xhosa, one greets another person by saying "Sawubona"--which is translated to "I see you". The reply is "Ngikhona"--which means "I am here".  When he told me this I realized how very important these words have been to us this year. 

I see you. 

Brian's process of completing his business degree has been a huge transition for our family. He took 20 credit hours at UCD  this semester and he did an amazing job getting everything done and done well. I am so proud of him!

This process has taught him a lot about himself and about how advocating for what you need and being honest with what you are able to do and not do changes everything. He has had to be vulnerable and willing to let his professors see him as a student and he has had to embrace his fellow students for who they are. This has been a unique process. Going back to school in your 40's is a different ballgame than when we are in our 20's. Seeing people in the midst of self-discovery is a trip. Brian has had to slow down and see people in a new way. I wish this could be added to his resume somehow. He's amazing!

And, for the record, his ability to see me for who I am and what I am trying to do this year has been astounding. There isn't another person in this world who sees me as he does. I treasure him for this and for 1,000,000 more reasons that I don't have time to write about here.

For me, the "I see you" has been a struggle. Teaching has been difficult for the last few years. I am going through a "crisis of faith" of sorts around how I am supposed to navigate my teaching career's future. I am feeling weary about how I see my students and the ins and outs of the job itself. I feel like I struggle every day with seeing the good and helping my kids see themselves as good. But when my superstar student told be about Sawubona, I realized I needed to stop spinning and start seeing again. It's why I got into this crazy job. I see students. I see them as viable humans that have so much to give and so much to learn. I want them to see how they fit in this world because they do. I want them to see why they're important. I also want them to see why reading and writing is life, but that might be asking a bit too much. :)

I am in the process of not throwing in the towel, but I'm not out of the woods yet. I am trying to see if who I am and what I do professionally is congruent. If you have any insight into this process, if you know winning lottery numbers, or if you think I would be good at a different job, tell me! I'll send you my resume! {For real.}

I Am Here 
When I start seeing, I become more present; more here. There is a lot of power to be in the here. A lot is missed when we're not. You won't be surprised that the ways we've been in the here have been through Baxter and Waffles. Baxter will be 10 in March and as he continues to age, he has become more and more loyal to us. He gives us hugs, brings us toys, plays with Waffles and is just generally here with us--no matter what. 

We got Waffles in June. He was a tiny kitten when we got him but he is now 13.5 pounds. That's huge! He has adjusted to being a Laniel just fine. He is a daddy's boy to be sure. He can't get enough of Brian. It's super cute. He has a wonderful purr, loud meow and he snores, loudly--just like Brian. 

These silly fur lovies help me so much. 
They help me catch my breath. They help me smile. They help me slow down. They help me feel loved and appreciated. They help me be here.

We hope that as we jump into 2020 we continue to embrace Sawubona and Ngikhona because to be seen and to be present truly is the best gift of all. 

Cheers!