Wednesday, February 28, 2018

How The Bachelor Unites Us

I swear I am not sinking to a new low; or maybe I am, but I have decided that having common ground with women from all walks of life is very powerful and I recently found some common ground through the ridiculousness that is The Bachelor.

I was recently at a gathering at a friend’s house who was hosting a Noonday Jewelry party {AWESOME jewelry and an AWESOME company!!!}. I found it fascinating to watch and interact with women who all have a million layers to their unique stories: Moms, non-moms, non-moms by choice, non-moms not by choice, single, married, dating, divorced, outside of the home professionals, inside of the home professionals, religious, non-religious
 etc. etc. etc.
I got home and said to Brian, “It’s exhausting being a woman.” I said this because I experienced the pressure I put on myself {do we all do this?} when I am in this sort of setting. I think we are getting better, but for some reason it seems like, as a woman, it is an instinct to “size up” the “competition”. I picture the scene from “Mean Girls” where any given setting filled with women has the potential to become an animalistic war zone.
Image result for mean girls animal
At this party, I was definitely comparing myself to the women in front of me. I kept noting things about myself that felt different:  I was the oldest, least in shape, non-mom by choice, etc.etc. I found myself stopping and starting conversations abruptly because I felt the “comparison monster” creep in.

And then I started talking about The Bachelor and it hit me. All we really need is a few places of common ground to lessen the competitive monster’s voice. When the group of women I was talking to all agreed that Clare is a train wreck, and that Arie is dud, and that we shouldn’t watch ALL of The Bachelor spin-offs {yet we do…}, I found strength in crazy and all the other stuff sort of faded away.
I found common ground in the Instagram world too. Lord help me.

Even if all of your brain cells and soul molecules are intact because you don’t watch The Bachelor, the point of this post is that as women, there are more places of common ground than we think and we need to find them quicker. As I have reflected on this night and owning the ease to which I let the comparison monster creep in, I realized that the magnificent layers to our unique stories need to be heard and embraced by each other--not held in competition with each other--and that should be our instinct.

So, thank you, fellow Bachelor watchers, especially those at this party, for giving me the realization that finding, embracing and celebrating common ground is what it’s all about...even if it is the most dramatic conversation ever.
Image result for most dramatic season ever
I want this.

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